So I also babysit other families. As I type
I’m sitting next to Tyler, he’s one of the boys in my first grade group in the
after care program that I work at, who’s 6 and has autism. We’ve been playing
Mario on the Wii for about 2 hours now when I told him I needed to finish up
some homework when I passed my remote to his older brother, Matthew, who’s 12.
Matthew is also a hardcore gamer, so Mario is no challenge. I have been working
with autistic kids for years now, and one of the most important things I have
to remember is that they want to constantly be in control of the situations
that they’re in. With this in mind, when I saw Matthew beating him I see Tyler
getting frustrated. His body tensed up, and you could hear the voice that comes
from his belly getting louder. When you see something triggering a meltdown,
you have to find what emotion is being pushed past the breaking point. Ellen
Notbohm from
the book Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew describes a meltdown from an autistic child’s
point of view. “Meltdowns and blow-ups are more horrid for me than they
are for you. They occur because one or more of my senses has gone into
overload, or because I’ve been pushed past the limit of my social abilities. If
you can figure out why my meltdowns occur, they can be prevented.” It’s
different for everyone though. Each child is unique, so planning a course of
action must also be unique. With Tyler, he is one of the sweetest and loving
kids I’ve ever met…but when he gets upset you see true aggression. Now calming
him down is the next step. Now, these children take everything quite literally,
and they answer everything truthfully. Talking it out with him and explaining
what the positive outcomes of working together could be helps. I told Tyler
that by watching Matt, he could learn and get better at what he was playing. It’s
like tying your shoes: at first, there are these two pieces of string, but by
the time you’ve learned how to tie them, there are presents on your feet every
day.
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